I want to share with you today why I feel mentors are incredibly critical and how you can go about finding them!
I have benefited a lot from my mentors and gained a lot of valuable lessons from people who have helped me tremendously in my journey. I want to share with you today why I feel mentors are incredibly critical and how you can go about finding them! But how to find a mentor who can pull you out?
So who are mentors, and why do you need them in your life?
You would have heard about successful rags-to-riches stories that changed many lives. But it is not just because these stories were inspirational; it is because these people used their stories and life experiences to guide other people.
Yes, it is what mentors do!
Mentors are the people who strive to give their best to the people with all the knowledge they learned the hard way by acting as trusted advisors, friends, philosophers, and guides.
Mentors are the people who want to give back to society by offering support to those who need it, aka the mentees. They are leaders who motivate, inspire, coach, and support people around them and help them find the right path. These mentors aid mentees in defining their goals and help them work through life’s challenges by giving them the tools, knowledge, and wisdom they need to succeed in all aspects of their lives.
How to find a mentor in life?
Are you wondering how to find a mentor in life and choose the right one for yourself? Here are three things that are critical when you are finding the right mentors:
Tip 1: Look for a mentor in your close circle first.
The journey to finding the right mentor begins at home. You can find the finest mentors in those you already have a relationship with, such as your parent, friend, relative, or instructor! Your parents can be your best mentors as they are the building blocks of your life. So, you can always rely on them blindly.
If you have a friend or sibling who specializes in any domain, such as blogging and has successfully done that, you can make them your mentor if you are struggling with blogging yourself. Or if your father is very strong at financial matters, make him your mentor on financial matters and seek his guidance. If your mother inspires you with the way she manages her relationships, make her your mentor on relationship matters. And so on.
The idea is that when searching for the right mentors, look in your coterie first, and you will find some.
Tip 2: Do not look for “a mentor,” but look for “mentors.”
Thinking of a mentor is not just thinking of only one person in life. It is unfair to expect only one mentor will steer you through all your problems, such as financial, professional, personal, or relationships.
I applied the same rule and found experts in every segment of my life that I needed help with.
I have a mentor for my financial matters. I have a mentor for my professional issues. I have a mentor for relationship concerns. I have a mentor for my entrepreneurship ventures and a mentor for my spiritual endeavours. And many more.
What is exciting is that these mentors are individuals who have done a lot in life in their respective areas of specialization or domain. And therefore, I rely on this group or tribe of mentors from various walks of my life.
And I do not expect one mentor to solve all my problems. It will be unfair for you to do so. So, find mentors who can guide you in their respective fortes. Do not look for only one mentor to mentor you in all aspects of your life; look for experts in different areas you want to be mentored on.
Tip 3: Look for mentors to whom you can relate.
When I started thinking about mentors very early in my life, it was obvious for me to look for people who were very high up in life, had done impeccably well, and were already immensely successful.
For example, if you own an e-commerce start-up, you would want to choose mentors who have done incredibly well and succeeded in their respective start-up ventures. And it is but obvious to do so.
But here is a challenge: when you look for mentors who are way above and that successful, they have spent enough years trying to get to a point where most things get crystallized in their heads. But you are operating on a different plane and have other challenges than theirs. So, you have no idea what they are talking about and can’t relate to them much. The gap between where you are and where they are in life is so vast that you will never be able to relate to them or even benefit from what they know and have to offer.
So, you will always feel overwhelmed, intimidated, and underconfident because you have no idea what they think or have in their minds. Therefore, do not look for mentors who are way out of your league, but look for the ones who are more relatable and approachable. It will keep you motivated and confident and help you set realistic goals. You will be able to understand what they say as you will be pretty much in the same zone as they are.
Tip 4: Do not look for mentors who think and act like you.
It can be pretty apparent to look for mentors who think and act as you do or who have lived their lives similar to what you have. The problem with this approach is that these mentors will make you a bigger version of yourself and not always a better version of yourself.
I actively look out for mentors who are different from me and have a very different perspective than what I have. I seek people or mentors who have a contrarian view of what I think, can happily challenge me, and blatantly tell me if I am wrong because they believe and see the world differently than I do.
These are the mentors you will benefit from the most because they will challenge you to think differently and consider different aspects that you have ignored so far.
Tip 5: Look for mentors who are in the same group as you are.
I have personally benefited the most from the people in my life who are in the same age group as mine. It is because they are relatable and are going through similar things that I am. But I also make sure that these people are very different in their ideologies and are experts in certain domains that I am not in. And then them being the same age as I am, helps me tremendously because they are going through the same problems, situations, and dilemmas but are looking at it very differently.
Therefore, when choosing a mentor, do not be guided by age as a factor but by relatability, skills, and differences in perspectives.
Here are a few other tips to look for when finding a mentor in life:
If you are still wondering how to find a mentor in life, here are a few more essential tips to look out for when choosing the right mentor for yourself:
- Choose a mentor who is committed to changing someone’s life and giving out the skills they have learned the hard way.
- Choose a mentor who is empathetic, warm, compassionate, and approachable.
- Choose a mentor who reassures mentees of his presence, help, and availability.
- Choose a mentor with whom you can develop a personal rapport.
- Choose a mentor who is ready to provide personal development tips and willing to go beyond what is expected.
- Choose an inspiring mentor who readily shares his knowledge and life experiences, failures, and challenges.
- Choose a mentor who can encourage you during challenging times and support your journey towards progress.
- Choose a mentor who can help you set goals and realize your aspirations.
- Choose a mentor who can provide additional resources to excel in your endeavour.
- Choose an honest mentor who can show you the mirror without being rude or who can easily give you constructive criticism.
- Last but not least, choose a mentor who you can easily call your friend, philosopher, and guide.
To conclude, when finding the right mentor, do not look just only for one mentor in life to solve all your problems, and do not look for people way beyond you. Also, do not look for people who are tremendously experienced; instead, look out for people who are different from you and who look or feel the world differently than you but are in the same age group.
If you apply these simple tips when choosing the right mentors, you can very well be on your way to finding experts, friends, companions, and associates who will help you tremendously.
So that’s my advice on how to find a mentor in life or rather how to find the right mentors in life. Please comment in the section below if you liked this post and have something to share with us. We would love to hear your thoughts.
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